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If man were immortal, do you realize what his meat bills would be?
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Realize
Realizing
Would
Men
Immortal
Meat
Bills
More quotes by Woody Allen
Life is a tragedy filled with suffering and despair and yet some people do manage to avoid jury duty.
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I write the script nobody sees it, not the people that put the money in the picture. I cast who I want, and make the film. That's why I've always felt the only thing standing between me and greatness, is me. There's no excuse for me not to be great except that I'm not.
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Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.
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We stand at a crossroads. One path leads to despair, the other to destruction. Let's hope we make the right choice.
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I learned a few things on my own since, and modified some of the things he taught me, but everything, unequivocally, that I learned about comedy writing I learned from Danny Simon.
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You'll find as you go through life that great depth and smoldering sensuality don't always win.
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... years of insanity have made this guy crazy!
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What is it about death that bothers me? Probably the hours.
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Magic has always been of a great interest of mine. I was an amateur magician when I was young. I used to practice and read up on it a lot. I'm well-aware of the history of magic.
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Then Job fell to his knees and cried to the Lord, Thine is the kingdom and the power and glory. Thou hast a good job. Don't blow it.
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I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.
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This stuff tastes awful I could have made a fortune selling it in my health-food store.
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I'm going to my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes.
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My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make films.
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For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath a pedestal.
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All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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Everyone wants to get out of living where they're living now, because life is a pretty tough proposition and not much fun. But when you think back to earlier times, you only extrapolate the nice things.
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Those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach gym.
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All i have in my life is my imagination
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