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I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Red
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More quotes by Woody Allen
There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?
Woody Allen
I think it's my job or the artist's job, to try and find some solution or some reason to accept things. But given the grimmest reality, I feel the grimmest facts are the real facts, the true facts: that you're born, you die, you suffer, it's to no purpose, and you're gone forever, ever, ever, and that's it.
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Astronomers say the universe is finite, which is a comforting thought for those people who can't remember where they leave things.
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I usually want to crawl into the ground after I make a film, almost invariably.
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I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.
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Between the Pope and air conditioning, I'd choose air conditioning.
Woody Allen
Sygmnd was a poor Austrian who'd lost all the vowels in his name in a boating accident.
Woody Allen
I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving dishes for Chinese restaurants.
Woody Allen
My father owned a small piece of land. He carried it with him wherever he went.
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I've always had an easy time directing actors because I always hire ones that are great before I get my hands on them.
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When I first started, there were writers that I looked up to that I felt very influenced by and very respectful toward their work and their opinion of my work.
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A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.
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I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
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You're a genius! And the proof is that both common people and intellectuals find your work completely incoherent.
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I think Hollywood has gone in a disastrous path. It's terrible. The years of cinema that were great were the '30s, '40s, not so much the '50s...but then the foreign films took over and it was a great age of cinema as American directors were influenced by them and that fueled the '50s and '60s and '70s.
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When you write the script, you're home in a room by yourself, and you're writing, and there's no connection with the real performing world. So you get a lot of things wrong and make a lot of mistakes and make a lot of bad choices.
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My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.
Woody Allen
I keep wondering if there is an afterlife, and if there is will they be able to break a twenty?
Woody Allen
A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings.
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I never have an alter ego in the movies. That's a fiction that the press has made up over the years, and it's fun to write that. It gives them something to write.
Woody Allen
