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Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Never
Geez
Life
Ruining
Searching
Gonna
Answers
Stop
Lasts
Enjoy

More quotes by Woody Allen

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It's important to control yourself because life gets too complicated if you don't, but the impulse is often there for people. Some say society should be more open. That doesn't work either.
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Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
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I think it's my job or the artist's job, to try and find some solution or some reason to accept things. But given the grimmest reality, I feel the grimmest facts are the real facts, the true facts: that you're born, you die, you suffer, it's to no purpose, and you're gone forever, ever, ever, and that's it.
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If you pursue the other woman, it's a losing situation and it's not good for your relationship or your marriage. If your marriage is open and you're allowed to, that's no good either. There's no way, really in the end, to be happy unless you get very lucky.
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I don't think my film style has changed. I'm doing the same kind of jokes I did when I was younger.
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She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.
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Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
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I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody's.
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Have you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people seem to have more fun when they're awake?
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And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
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Should I marry W.? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name.
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I'm at the stage of life when if a girl says no to me I'm profoundly grateful to her.
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I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.
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Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!
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I consider myself a completely lucky filmmaker. I've had nothing but good luck. Everything I've needed has come my way.
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When a doctor makes a mistake, it's best to bury the subject.
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If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
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The great question of philosophy remains: If life is meaningless, what can be done about alphabet soup?
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How am I immature? Intellectually, emotionally, and sexually. Yeah, but in what other ways?
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In short, the best thing to do is behave in a manner befitting one's age. If you are sixteen or under, try not to go bald.
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