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I recently turned 60. Practically a third of my life is over.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Birthday
Third
Thirds
Turned
Life
Practically
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More quotes by Woody Allen
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
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I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
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You're so good looking I can barely keep my eyes on the meter.
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Achilles only had an Achilles heel, I have an entire Achilles body.
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When one chooses to be a writer, psychologically there's a reason for that because you like the isolation and you like to be by yourself and you are by nature timid.
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Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.
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I always feel, I guess being a product of the movies of the 40s where movies were the greatest things and screens were big and palaces were palaces and stars were larger than life that reality was so much inferior to what we felt was conceivably possible from what we had seen in the movies.
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You know what my philosophy of life is? That it’s important to have some laughs, but you got to suffer a little too, because otherwise you miss the whole point to life.
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I know what I think but I don't know how to put it into words. Maybe I could get a little bit drunk and dance it for you.
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Sometimes the critics will like a film, and the public doesn't come. Sometimes the critics won't like the film, and the public will come. It's completely spontaneous. It's a hazard.
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What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
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I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.
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My gift was in comedy. I found out I could make jokes. I could tell jokes. I could write them. So over the years, that's what I've done.
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He's a politician. That's a notch below child molester.
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There have been times when I've thought about it - but with my luck it would probably turn out to be only a temporary solution.
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Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.
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The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only when it's done right.
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When a man is driving in a car and looks out the window and notices a woman with a great body, as he strains to check her face out, how does she know to keep turning so the back of her head is always toward him?
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While we're waiting for a cab I'll give you your lesson for today. Don't listen to what your teachers tell ya, you know. Don't pay attention. Just, just see what they look like and that's how you'll know what life is really gonna be like.
Woody Allen
Anything worth knowing cannot be understood by the human mind.
Woody Allen
