Quote

She had been critical of his new torch song, A Side Order of Heartache, Please, suggesting it could be used as a good way to break in their new paper shredder.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Order
Paper
Shredder
Used
Please
Torch
Way
Humor
Torches
Good
Side
Heartache
Sides
Suggesting
Break
Critics
Funny
Critical
Song
Criticism

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I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
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I'm trying to arrange my life so I don't have to be present.
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I'm at the stage of life when if a girl says no to me I'm profoundly grateful to her.
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I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, [and] receives new truth as an angel from Heaven.
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In life, one is entitled to a side dish of either coleslaw or potato salad, and the choice must be made in terror, with the knowledge that not only is our time on earth limited but most kitchens close at ten.
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All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.
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Showing up is 80 percent of life.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
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Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.
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There's no correlation between what the public likes and what I'm after. I'm in a different world.
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I feel humor is important for those two reasons: that it is a little bit of refreshment like music, and that women have told me over the years that it is very, very important to them.
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Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.
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There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
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Subjectivity is objective.
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Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.
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I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
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I have no regard for that kind of ceremony. I just don't think they know what they're doing. When you see who wins those things-or who doesn't win them-you can see how meaningless this Oscar thing is.
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It's all through the actors I cannot write in that idiom
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You look up after many years and you find that a film has become a classic because it's meaningful to people and alive, decade after decade.
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The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence.
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