Quote

We knew the front door was always left open, but we broke in just to keep in practice. Doxy turned all the Washburn family photos to the wall so there wouldn't be any witnesses.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Left
Wall
Witness
Keep
Wouldn
Broke
Always
Humor
Turned
Knew
Door
Open
Fronts
Practice
Front
Witnesses
Funny
Crime
Photos
Family
Doors
Criminals

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Death is an acquired trait.
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If you aren't failing, you aren't trying.
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Manute Bol is so skinny they save money on road trips. They just fax him from city to city.
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My success has allowed me to strike out with a higher class of women.
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Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses?
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Life is a concentration camp. You're stuck here and there's no way out and you can only rage impotently against your persecutors.
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Me sitting down for dinner with Ingmar Bergman felt like a house painter sitting down with Picasso.
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I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
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I like broad comedy. If I had an idea tomorrow for a film that was all slapstick and broad comedy, and it was an idea that interested me, I would not hesitate to do it because I enjoy watching these kinds of film.
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A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.
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When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty.
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People say that death is a part of life and there must be something to it, but I just see it as bad news and I want everybody to stop sugarcoating it.
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All over the world, relationships between men and women are very, very tricky and very difficult and you don't learn anything. It's not an exact science, so you can't learn anything. You're always going by instinct and your instinct betrays you because you want what you want when you want it.
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The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty.
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In the event of war, I'm a hostage.
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I don't inhale because it gives you cancer, but I look so incredibly handsome with a cigarette that I can't not hold one.
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Better not think too much. Relying more on the body: it is more trustworthy.
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There are three things Jewish people worship-God, Chinese food and wall-to-wall carpeting.
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There are two important things in the world, the first is sex. The other isn't all that important.
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