Quote

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Taught
Shave
Woman
Shaving
Night
Saturday
Never
Marry
Jewish
Tradition
Raised
Gentile
Especially
Gentiles

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There's no rhyme or reason to anything that I do. It's whatever seems right at the time.
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I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.
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I wouldn't necessarily want to be a big muscular guy. It's nice to be gorgeous whether you're male or female assuming you don't lose whatever else you have.
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I carry a bullet in my breast pocket. Once, a crazy evangelist threw a bible at me, which would have gone through my heart if it wasn't for the bullet.
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Let's say there was a burning building and you could rush in and you could save only one thing: either the last known copy of Shakespeare's plays or some anonymous human being. What would you do?
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I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
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I don't like theatrical actors and actresses. I like people that talk like real human beings.
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Every hooker I ever speak to tells me that it beats the hell out of waitressing.
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Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
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There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
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Magic has always been of a great interest of mine. I was an amateur magician when I was young. I used to practice and read up on it a lot. I'm well-aware of the history of magic.
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I loathed every day and regret every moment I spent in a school.
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I'm going to my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes.
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I was a nervous child, I was a bedwetter. I used to sleep with an electric blanket and I was constantly electrocuting myself.
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The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
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I usually want to crawl into the ground after I make a film, almost invariably.
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Life is horrible, but it is not relentlessly black from wire to wire. You can sit down and hear a Mozart symphony, or you can watch the Marx Brothers, and this will give you a pleasant escape for a while. And that is about the best that you can do.
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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I don't get depressed I grow a tumor instead.
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By now they had mastered my own language, but they still made simple mistakes, like using 'hermeneutics,' when they meant 'heuristic'.
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