Quote

The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5' 7, it is impossible to get your congressman on the phone.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Impossible
Funny
Littles
Unresponsive
Government
Congressman
Little
Phone
Needs
Phones
Men
Congress
Humor

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Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.
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When you travel around the country, you see what a tough town New York is: rude, competitive, a town where good, logical ideas are ignored in favor of unworkable ones. And yet, all these other towns are so dead and boring compared to New York.
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We stand at a crossroads. One path leads to despair, the other to destruction. Let's hope we make the right choice.
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New York is my home and I have a particular fondness for it. I think it's a place where you can generate any kind of story wonderfully. But I also would be very happy to make a film in Paris or Rome.
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And my parents finally realize I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They rent out my room.
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I don't fear death. - I just don't want to be around when it happens.
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All over the world, relationships between men and women are very, very tricky and very difficult and you don't learn anything. It's not an exact science, so you can't learn anything. You're always going by instinct and your instinct betrays you because you want what you want when you want it.
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How does gravity work? And if it were to cease suddenly, would certain restaurants still require a jacket?
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In real life I'm not the character I play in my films. I'm reasonably competent, I work very hard, I'm disciplined, I lead a very middle class life. I work in the mornings, I have lunch, I practise my clarinet, I go to the movies, I eat out in restaurants or watch ball games on television or at the ball games.
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I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.
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If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
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I like filming in New York a lot myself, but London is accommodating to me the weather's very good there and the conditions for shooting and the financial conditions, the artistic conditions are good, so it's a pleasant place to shoot.
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Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.
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If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
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Some men are heterosexual and some men are bisexual and some men don't think about sex at all ... you know, they become lawyers.
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My analyst warned me, but you were so beautiful I got another analyst.
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you can touch and what touches you.
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Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
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