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The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5' 7, it is impossible to get your congressman on the phone.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Littles
Unresponsive
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Phone
Needs
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More quotes by Woody Allen
Hey listen -- I've proved a lot of things. That's how I pay my rent. Theories and little observations. A puckish remark now and then. Occasional maxims. It beats picking olives, but let's not get carried away.
Woody Allen
I do feel it's important to have some kind of faith in something, but [it is] impossible for many of us. I personally don't have any faith in anything, but it's great if you can.
Woody Allen
Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.
Woody Allen
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
Woody Allen
There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
Woody Allen
I don't know what I want, but I know what I don't want
Woody Allen
I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
Woody Allen
A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.
Woody Allen
All over the world, relationships between men and women are very, very tricky and very difficult and you don't learn anything. It's not an exact science, so you can't learn anything. You're always going by instinct and your instinct betrays you because you want what you want when you want it.
Woody Allen
Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses?
Woody Allen
I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.
Woody Allen
My films are a form of psychoanalysis, except that it is I who am paid, which changes everything.
Woody Allen
Anything worth knowing cannot be understood by the human mind.
Woody Allen
Notes for a ballet, The Spell: ... Suddenly Sigmund hears the flutter of wings, and a group of wild swans flies across the moon ... Sigmund is astounded to see that their leader is part swan and part woman - unfortunately, divided lengthwise. She enchants Sigmund, who is careful not to make any poultry jokes.
Woody Allen
If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
Woody Allen
If you aren't failing every now and then, you're probably playing it too safe.
Woody Allen
I've been lucky because my films have consistently made a profit, almost all of them have made a profit. Never a huge profit, but nobody gets hurt. And therefore I get a lot of freedom.
Woody Allen
Everyone wants to get out of living where they're living now, because life is a pretty tough proposition and not much fun. But when you think back to earlier times, you only extrapolate the nice things.
Woody Allen
Marriage? That's for life! It's like cement!
Woody Allen
The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen