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Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Rivers
Drink
Belief
Knowledge
Others
River
Stupidity
Deeply
More quotes by Woody Allen
I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.
Woody Allen
If I could just hope to have a major talent, then I would rather have it in music than in any other field.
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I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.
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Comedians have a tendency to have a limited range, they tend to do one thing and do it very well, but it's limited.
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What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
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No matter what the shrinks, or the pundits, or the self-help books tell you, when it comes to love, it's luck.
Woody Allen
Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.
Woody Allen
Where I grew up in Brooklyn, nobody committed suicide. Everyone was too unhappy.
Woody Allen
It's funny. Maria Elena and I, we are meant for each other and not meant for each other, it's a contradiction.
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I was walking through the woods, thinking about Christ. If He was a carpenter, I wondered what He charged for bookshelves.
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What advice would I give the average homeowner to protect himself against burglars? Well, the first thing is to keep a light on in the house when you go out. It must be at least a sixty-watt bulb anything less and the burglar will ransack the house, out of contempt for the wattage.
Woody Allen
The heart is a very, very resilient little muscle. It really is.
Woody Allen
I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
Woody Allen
Magic has always been of a great interest of mine. I was an amateur magician when I was young. I used to practice and read up on it a lot. I'm well-aware of the history of magic.
Woody Allen
I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.
Woody Allen
It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blowing off.
Woody Allen
My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.
Woody Allen
You know what my philosophy of life is? That it’s important to have some laughs, but you got to suffer a little too, because otherwise you miss the whole point to life.
Woody Allen
Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats.
Woody Allen
