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I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Wife
Funny
Place
Tended
Pedestal
Sarcasm
Sarcastic
Humor

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The meaning of life is that nobody knows the meaning of life.
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I don't believe in God. Just try getting a plumber on the weekend.
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They were doing the Dying Swan at the ballet. And there was a rumor that some bookmarkers had drifted into town from upstate New York and that they had fixed the bullet. There was a lot of money bet on the swan to live.
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Death is an acquired trait.
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I'm trying to arrange my life so I don't have to be present.
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The content dictates the style all the time. That's the way it is. If the content of the film - as in Husbands and Wives - is highly jagged, neurotic, fast-paced, nervous New York film, it just called for that kind of shooting, editing and performance.
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Over the years I've never written or made movies about political themes 'cause while they do have current critical importance, in the large, large scheme of things, only the big questions matter and the answers to those big questions are very, very depressing.
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If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.
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You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.
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The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down.
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Abysmal vermin that I am, I couldn't of course tell her that it was her incredible mother that I wanted to see again… I knew only as I drove through the cold, night autumn air that somewhere Freud, Sophocles and Eugene O’Neill were laughing.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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There are worse things than death. Many of them playing at a theater near you.
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I am an only child. I have one sister.
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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
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I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.
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In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
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My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
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Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
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Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle.
Woody Allen