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I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Sarcastic
Humor
Wife
Funny
Place
Tended
Pedestal
Sarcasm

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Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.
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Life is for the living.
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Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
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To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer. Not to love is to suffer.
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By now they had mastered my own language, but they still made simple mistakes, like using 'hermeneutics,' when they meant 'heuristic'.
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You can be distracted by your love life, by the baseball game, movies, by the nonsense. Can I get my kid into this private school? Can I get this girl to go out with me Saturday night? Am I going to get the promotion in my office? All this stuff, but in the end the universe burns out. So I think it's completely meaningless.
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I see no advantages in aging whatsoever. You become shriveled. You become decrepit. You lose your faculties. Your peer group passes away. You sit in a room gumming your porridge. I don't see any advantage in this whatsoever.
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It's all through the actors I cannot write in that idiom
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I have a limitless amount of great music at my disposal and it's very, very pleasurable because when the music goes on the film it's amazing how much it livens up the film and gives it an emotional kick in the pants, sort of.
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Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.
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Some women feel power is important, some women feel that looks are important, tenderness, intelligence...but sense of humor seems to permeate all of them.
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There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
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Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could not blink my eyes in unison. — If The Impressionists Had Been Dentists
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My wife is immature. Whenever I take a bath, she sinks my boats.
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I am an only child. I have one sister.
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I idolized Superman when I was younger. I thought he and I had a lot in common. He was always going into phonebooths and taking off all his clothes.
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My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.
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90 per cent of success is turning up.
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