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There's nothing like the discovery of an unknown work by a great thinker to set the intellectual community atwitter and cause academics to dart about like those things one sees when looking at a drop of water under a microscope.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
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Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
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The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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I am plagued by doubts.
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The only thing standing between me and greatness is me.
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I do occasionally envy the person who is religious naturally, without being brainwashed into it or suckered into it by all the organized hustles.
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Then Job fell to his knees and cried to the Lord, Thine is the kingdom and the power and glory. Thou hast a good job. Don't blow it.
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History is the same thing over and over again.
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[The universe is] haphazard, morally neutral, and unimaginably violent.
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Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
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I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points?
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We stand at a crossroads. One path leads to despair, the other to destruction. Let's hope we make the right choice.
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Real software engineers don't debug programs, they verify correctness. This process doesn't necessarily involve execution of anything on a computer, except perhaps a Correctness Verification Aid package. Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
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My gift was in comedy. I found out I could make jokes. I could tell jokes. I could write them. So over the years, that's what I've done.
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There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
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I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
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