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I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Humorous
Enthusiasm
Idea
Ideas
Never
Plunging
Prevented
Incompetence
Witty

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I think universal harmony is a pipedream and it may be more productive to focus on more modest goals, like a ban on yodeling.
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I see no advantages in aging whatsoever. You become shriveled. You become decrepit. You lose your faculties. Your peer group passes away. You sit in a room gumming your porridge. I don't see any advantage in this whatsoever.
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I never knew what Amazon was. I've never seen any of those series, even on cable. I've never seen The Sopranos, or Mad Men. I'm out every night and when I come home, I watch the end of the baseball or basketball game, and there's Charlie Rose and I go to sleep.
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You make a film and always hope you're going make Citizen Kane or The Bicycle Thief. You make the film, and for one reason or another, one clicks and one doesn't, but it's out of your control completely.
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I think that the tendency for most people is to fall back on a comic interpretation of things because things are so sad, so terrible. If you didn't laugh you'd kill yourself. But the truth of the matter is that existence in general is very very tragic, very very sad, very brutal and very unhappy.
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Marriage is the death of hope.
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Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.
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I was in analysis for years because of a traumatic childhood I was breast-fed through falsies.
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People still have existential anxiety. It just may not be expressed in Hebraic idiom.
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To you I'm an atheist to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
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Money is not everything, but it is better than having one's health.
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I loathed every day and regret every moment I spent in a school.
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In 1940 I was just turning 5 years old and being taken to the movies. For those of us who were not old enough to understand the horror of war it was a very romantic era because these guys were kissing their wives and girlfriends goodbye and going off to fight and become heroes.
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Life is a concentration camp. You're stuck here and there's no way out and you can only rage impotently against your persecutors.
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The whole thrust of science and the medical profession is to try and prevent it from happening, to try to prolong life, to keep you from dying, to keep you from getting older, to rejuvenate you. I mean, that's everybody's wish. The fountain of youth is everybody's sought-after thing.
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A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
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