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he's a genius, she's a genius, wow, you know alot of geniuses, you should meet some stupid people sometime, you might learn something

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
People
Witty
Humorous
Meet
Genius
Stupid
Alot
Learn
Geniuses
Might
Sometime
Something
Wow

More quotes by Woody Allen

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I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, [and] receives new truth as an angel from Heaven.
Woody Allen
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When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.
Woody Allen
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Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
Woody Allen
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I am two with nature.
Woody Allen
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Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
Woody Allen
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Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
Woody Allen
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A fast word about oral contraception. I was involved in an extremely good example of oral contraception two weeks ago. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
Woody Allen
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Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses?
Woody Allen
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All my life is passing in front of my eyes. The worst part of it is I'm driving a used car.
Woody Allen
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In real life I'm not the character I play in my films. I'm reasonably competent, I work very hard, I'm disciplined, I lead a very middle class life. I work in the mornings, I have lunch, I practise my clarinet, I go to the movies, I eat out in restaurants or watch ball games on television or at the ball games.
Woody Allen
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They were doing the Dying Swan at the ballet. And there was a rumor that some bookmarkers had drifted into town from upstate New York and that they had fixed the bullet. There was a lot of money bet on the swan to live.
Woody Allen
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Sylvia Plath. Interesting poetess whose tragic suicide was misinterpreted as romantic by the college-girl mentality.
Woody Allen
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For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have.
Woody Allen
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My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.
Woody Allen
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When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
Woody Allen
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You always think another time would have been ideal for you . . . the reality is there was no novocaine when you went to the dentist.
Woody Allen
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I wonder if Socrates and Plato took a house on Crete during the summer.
Woody Allen
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And in all of Babylonia there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, 'til the prophets bade the multitudes get a grip on themselves and shape up.
Woody Allen
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There's no rhyme or reason to anything that I do. It's whatever seems right at the time.
Woody Allen
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If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
Woody Allen