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I can't do anything to death, doctor's orders.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Doctor
Doctors
Death
Order
Anything
Orders
More quotes by Woody Allen
If I can play a scene in a master shot, I always prefer it. And the actors always prefer it. It's fun to look at on the screen, the actors get a chance to sink their teeth into something substantial, and it's economically helpful.
Woody Allen
I've been escaping my whole life. Since I was a little child, I escaped into the movies on the other side as an audience member. I escaped by going into the movies and sitting in the movies all day long.
Woody Allen
Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.
Woody Allen
I'm very old-fashioned. I believe that people should stay married for life, like pigeons and Catholics.
Woody Allen
How wrong Emily Dickinson was! Hope is not the thing with feathers. The thing with feathers has turned out to be my nephew. I must take him to a specialist in Zurich.
Woody Allen
Doing abominations is against the law, particularly if the abominations are done while wearing a lobster bib.
Woody Allen
If you are not failing now and again, its a sign you are not doing anything very innovative
Woody Allen
Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.
Woody Allen
I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.
Woody Allen
Why ruin a good story with the truth?
Woody Allen
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
Woody Allen
I know of only six genuine comic geniuses in movie history Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Groucho Marx & Harpo Marx, Peter Sellers, and W.C. Fields.
Woody Allen
Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.
Woody Allen
Arlene and I have to get a divorce. She thinks I'm a pervert because I drank our water bed.
Woody Allen
I never thought I was doing anyone a favour by bringing children into the world. With people as cruel to each other as they are, it's a terrible proposition. The best of lives are sad and tragic. The best of them. My general conclusion is that it's not a nice thing to do. The world doesn't need it. The kid doesn't need it.
Woody Allen
I can levitate birds. No one cares.
Woody Allen
This year I'm a star, but what will I be next year? A black hole?
Woody Allen
When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce.
Woody Allen
History is the same thing over and over again.
Woody Allen
Humorists always sit at the children's table.
Woody Allen
