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I can't do anything to death, doctor's orders.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Doctor
Doctors
Death
Order
Anything
Orders
More quotes by Woody Allen
Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
Woody Allen
I don't own a computer. I've never seen anything online at all - nothing. I don't own a word processor. I have none of that stuff. It's not an act of rebellion. I'm just not a gadget person.
Woody Allen
If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
Woody Allen
If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.
Woody Allen
I never thought I was doing anyone a favour by bringing children into the world. With people as cruel to each other as they are, it's a terrible proposition. The best of lives are sad and tragic. The best of them. My general conclusion is that it's not a nice thing to do. The world doesn't need it. The kid doesn't need it.
Woody Allen
What I do know about physics is that to a man standing on the shore, time passes quicker than to a man on a boat - especially if the man on the boat is with his wife.
Woody Allen
I think, on both sides of the camera or the novel: Distraction. I'm obsessed with: Can I get this actress or my third act to work? I'm distracted. I'm interested in that so I don't sit home and think, Gee, life is meaningless. We're all going to die. The universe is pulling apart at breakneck speed.
Woody Allen
I always thought that as long as man is mortal, he will never be relaxed.
Woody Allen
Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.
Woody Allen
When a doctor makes a mistake, it's best to bury the subject.
Woody Allen
I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public quite brilliantly.
Woody Allen
Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
Woody Allen
Boy, the food at this place is really terrible. The other one says, Yeah, I know and such small portions. Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.
Woody Allen
Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.
Woody Allen
Enthusiasm is a good engine, but it needs intelligence for a driver.
Woody Allen
There is always the possibility that people will change. Real change is more rare. You are who you are at a certain age in life you are pretty much a variation of that your whole life. It's conceivable that you will change but it's not likely.
Woody Allen
Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
Woody Allen
I think Hollywood has gone in a disastrous path. It's terrible. The years of cinema that were great were the '30s, '40s, not so much the '50s...but then the foreign films took over and it was a great age of cinema as American directors were influenced by them and that fueled the '50s and '60s and '70s.
Woody Allen
Have you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people seem to have more fun when they're awake?
Woody Allen
Believing would be easier if God would show himself by depositing a million dollars in a Swiss bank account in my name
Woody Allen
