Quote

Standing in a garage no more makes you a car than standing in a church makes you a Christian.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Religion
Christian
Makes
Garage
Witty
Humorous
Car
Standing
Church

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Those modern analysts, they charge so much! In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you. For ten marks he would treat you and press your pants. For fifteen marks Freud would let you treat him - that included a choice of any two vegetables.
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Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you can touch and what touches you.
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I idolized Superman when I was younger. I thought he and I had a lot in common. He was always going into phonebooths and taking off all his clothes.
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I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
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Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.
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I never start editing a film until it's completely shot I don't edit along the way, ever. When it's finished I come in here [screening room] and we start with reel one, scene one and start editing shot by shot by shot until we're finished.
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A fast word about oral contraception. I was involved in an extremely good example of oral contraception two weeks ago. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
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Sex is better than talk. Ask anybody in this bar. Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.
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Someday the lion is going to lie down with the lamb, but the lamb isn't going to get much sleep.
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The great question of philosophy remains: If life is meaningless, what can be done about alphabet soup?
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Life is a tragedy filled with suffering and despair and yet some people do manage to avoid jury duty.
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I've always liked, someday the lamb will lay by the lion.... but it won't get much sleep.
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I never wanted to or expected to make a film outside of New York. New York became very, very expensive. The same $18 million spent in Barcelona or Rome goes much further there.
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I wonder if Socrates and Plato took a house on Crete during the summer.
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He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion... no, make that: he - he romanticized it all out of proportion. Yes. To him, no matter what the season was, this was still a town that existed in black and white and pulsated to the great tunes of George Gershwin.
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I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.
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Problems are like toilet paper. You pull on one and ten more come.
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I've always had an easy time directing actors because I always hire ones that are great before I get my hands on them.
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I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
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Chastity is curable, if detected early.
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