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Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Beowulf
Advice
More quotes by Woody Allen
Where I grew up in Brooklyn, nobody committed suicide. Everyone was too unhappy.
Woody Allen
I don't get depressed I grow a tumor instead.
Woody Allen
Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end.
Woody Allen
I took a puff of the wrong cigarette at a fraternity dance once, and the cops had to get me, y'know. I broke two teeth trying to give a hickie to the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen
One of the wonderful things about making a film of any genre is that you have dialogue. You can take up a position. If you want to say something about your position, you can just say it. You don't have to spend massive amounts of screen time.
Woody Allen
If I just got up in the morning and had no place to go and was retired or something, I would be sitting there and be thinking, Gee, what is the purpose of life? Why are we all finite? Why do we get old and die? Is there nothing out there? Why is it so tragic? Why do our loved ones perish? Why do we generate? Who wants to think about that stuff
Woody Allen
Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.
Woody Allen
Every success is built on the ability to do better than good enough. As you climb the ladder of success, be sure it's leaning against the right building. Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Woody Allen
In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
Woody Allen
The prettiest women are almost always the most boring, and that is why some people feel there is no God.
Woody Allen
Relationships are really what interest me the most. And I think, in the end, they interest most people the most. Even when you read Tolstoy or something, basically they're about man and woman relationships.
Woody Allen
I'm really impotent against the overwhelming bleakness of the universe and the only thing I can do is my little gift [filmmaking] and do it the best I can, [...] which is cold comfort.
Woody Allen
The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and singers. They were giants.
Woody Allen
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
Woody Allen
Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
Woody Allen
There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.
Woody Allen
My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
Woody Allen
If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
Woody Allen
Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.
Woody Allen
Sex on Twitter can't hurt you - unless you fall off.
Woody Allen
