Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.
Woody Allen
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Tell
Terrific
Stories
Silly
Asked
Crazy
Sleep
Story
Funny
Oral
Girl
Contraception
More quotes by Woody Allen
I'm so excited-I think today I'm going to brush all my teeth.
Woody Allen
What' s the matter with me? Why can't I be cool?
Woody Allen
My heart says one thing. My head says another. Very hard to get your heart and head together in life.
Woody Allen
Whosoever loveth wisdom is righteous, but he that keepeth company with fowl is weird.
Woody Allen
I had an IQ test. The results came back negative.
Woody Allen
I foresee death by culture shock.
Woody Allen
Chastity is curable, if detected early.
Woody Allen
I do feel it's important to have some kind of faith in something, but [it is] impossible for many of us. I personally don't have any faith in anything, but it's great if you can.
Woody Allen
Sometimes some of the best moments are contributed by the actors being creative, with their own improvisations.
Woody Allen
You're still in love' 'No I'm not, I'm not She'll always be a part of me, and she's an important person in my life but for the two of us something wasn't working.' 'What element?' 'We never found out
Woody Allen
I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.
Woody Allen
I don't get depressed I grow a tumor instead.
Woody Allen
For some reason it gives people pleasure to equate the life of certain movie actors or actresses with their actual lives.
Woody Allen
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
Woody Allen
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
Woody Allen
Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
Woody Allen
I like filming in New York a lot myself, but London is accommodating to me the weather's very good there and the conditions for shooting and the financial conditions, the artistic conditions are good, so it's a pleasant place to shoot.
Woody Allen
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Woody Allen
I came home one night, some month ago, and I went to the closet in my bedroom...and a moth ate my sports jacket. He was laying on the floor, nauseous, y'know.
Woody Allen
Usually, you hire people that you think are wonderful.
Woody Allen
