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Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Become
Women
Men
Attracted
Love
Witty
Humorous
Woman
Learn
Fall
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I can't enjoy anything unless everybody is. If one guy is starving someplace, that puts a crimp in my evening.
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Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
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I sued American Apparel because they calculatingly took my name, my likeness and image and used them publicly to promote their business.
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Don't think of death as an ending. Think of it as a really effective way of cutting down your expenses.
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Relationships are really what interest me the most. And I think, in the end, they interest most people the most. Even when you read Tolstoy or something, basically they're about man and woman relationships.
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I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I have a tendency to... if I get too mellow, I ripen and then rot.
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I think that the tendency for most people is to fall back on a comic interpretation of things because things are so sad, so terrible. If you didn't laugh you'd kill yourself. But the truth of the matter is that existence in general is very very tragic, very very sad, very brutal and very unhappy.
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90 per cent of success is turning up.
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When I was young, I wanted to be a dramatic writer, a writer of tragedy. Nothing would've pleased me more than if I could have written like Eugene O'Neil or Tennessee Williams.
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I didn't go to Paris until I was a grown-up in 1965. And when I went to Paris, it was the Paris I knew only from American movies.
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Regarding love what can you say? It's not the quantity of your sexual relations that counts. It's the quality. On the other hand if the quantity drops below once every eight months, I would definitely look into it.
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When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
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There's no way to prove that there is no God. You just have to take it on faith.
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My parents were very Old World. They come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the Old World. Their values in life are God and carpeting.
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Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
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Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
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I don't mind dying... as long as I don't have to be there when it happens.
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I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
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There will be no major solution to the suffering of humanity until we reach some understanding of who we are, what the purpose of creation was, what happens after death. Until those questions are resolved we are caught.
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