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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Humor
Agnostic
Week
Electric
Belief
Witty
Lasts
Atheist
Last
Tongue
Funny
God
Roller
Believe
Caught
Typewriter
Atheism
Typewriters
More quotes by Woody Allen
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For some reason I've always had an irrational love for New York. There's no reason that you would necessarily like it on paper. It's very expensive.
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The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
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I recently turned 60. Practically a third of my life is over.
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I've always been interested in being in other people's movies. I never get any offers.
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All i have in my life is my imagination
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Am I my brother's keeper? Yes. Interestingly, in my case, I share that honor with the Prospect Park Zoo.
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Anything worth knowing cannot be understood by the human mind.
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I'm a teleological, existential agnostic.
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Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.
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Life is a tragedy filled with suffering and despair and yet some people do manage to avoid jury duty.
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I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
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It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
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To be a film director is not a democracy, it's really a tyranny. You're the head of the project, for better rather than worse. I write the film and I direct the film, I decide who's going to be in it, I decide on the editing, I put in the music from my own record collection.
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A deranged person is supposed to have the strength of ten men. I have the strength of one small boy... with polio.
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For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have.
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