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Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Death
Lettered
Life
Numbered
Statistics
Witty
Humorous
Humor
Days
Funny
More quotes by Woody Allen
In real life, Keaton believes in God. But she also believes that the radio works because there are tiny people inside it.
Woody Allen
Some people are funny, and some people are not funny. Many people who are not funny can make a living at it. You don't have to be great to make a living at it. Just like a doctor who doesn't have to be great can still make a living out of it.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
Woody Allen
Cynicism is reality with an alternate spelling.
Woody Allen
I consider myself a completely lucky filmmaker. I've had nothing but good luck. Everything I've needed has come my way.
Woody Allen
There's nothing sexier than a lapsed Catholic.
Woody Allen
The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and singers. They were giants.
Woody Allen
A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone.
Woody Allen
In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
Woody Allen
I sued American Apparel because they calculatingly took my name, my likeness and image and used them publicly to promote their business.
Woody Allen
The great question of philosophy remains: If life is meaningless, what can be done about alphabet soup?
Woody Allen
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
Woody Allen
I'm a teleological, existential agnostic.
Woody Allen
If 90% of success in life is showing up, the other 10% depends on what you're showing up for.
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Child molestation is a touchy subject... Read the papers! Half the country's doing it!
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I never wanted to or expected to make a film outside of New York. New York became very, very expensive. The same $18 million spent in Barcelona or Rome goes much further there.
Woody Allen
The Jewish culture - people that are Jewish have a certain cultural habit that they've formed and one of those habits is an appreciation of theater and music - these are cultural things one does associate with values that are promulgated by Jewish families. I think that's a good thing.
Woody Allen
I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
Woody Allen
The true test of maturity is not how old a person is but how he reacts to awakening in the mid-town area in his shorts.
Woody Allen