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Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Reason
Cooking
Must
Killing
Men
Kill
Drink
Beverage
Humor
Beverages
Food
Kills
Funny
Frequently
Doe
Alcohol
More quotes by Woody Allen
I always feel the cynicism is reality with maybe an alternate spelling or something because I feel that I have real perspective on this particular issue of punishment in society.
Woody Allen
Our love, our love will last forever. It's forever but it just doesn't work. That's why it will always be romantic because it can not be complete.
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I always write the same way. I always write with a yellow pad and a ballpoint pen on my bed. And then I go and type it up afterwards. I've always done that. Those things become habitual.
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I cannot say for certain that God does not exist I think the worst thing that can be said about him is that he's a bit of an underachiever.
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I am told the settlement of $5 million I am being paid is the largest amount ever paid under the New York right to privacy law
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That’s one of the nice things about writing, or any art if the thing’s real, it just lives.
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I'm going to my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes.
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I don't like to meet the actor and have a lot of conferences and talk about their sub-life and their off-screen life and their back stories and all that nonsense, because it never means anything.
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I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.
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When I'm writing something, if there's a part that's good for me, then I'll play it. Otherwise, I don't. And I notice that there are less and less parts for me in my own writing.
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Many people who get a lot of money are willing to work with me for no money. This is true.
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Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
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I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts.
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I am two with nature.
Woody Allen
Boy, the food at this place is really terrible. The other one says, Yeah, I know and such small portions. Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.
Woody Allen
I came home one night, some month ago, and I went to the closet in my bedroom...and a moth ate my sports jacket. He was laying on the floor, nauseous, y'know.
Woody Allen
The comedies are not a million laughs on the set. Its business and the dramas are business as well, really. When I'm writing it I struggle more with drama because I started out in comedy.
Woody Allen
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.
Woody Allen
Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could not blink my eyes in unison. — If The Impressionists Had Been Dentists
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See, I never gain an ounce, because, you know, my anxiety acts like aerobics.
Woody Allen
