Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
Woody Allen
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
God
Plumber
Funny
Agnostic
Inspirational
Sunday
Trying
Witty
Humorous
Atheist
Findings
Finding
More quotes by Woody Allen
I can levitate birds. No one cares.
Woody Allen
A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings.
Woody Allen
Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.
Woody Allen
It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
Woody Allen
I was walking through the woods, thinking about Christ. If He was a carpenter, I wondered what He charged for bookshelves.
Woody Allen
The heart wants what it wants.
Woody Allen
The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. I think that the worst thing you could say about him is that basically he's an underachiever. After all, you know, there are worse things in life than death.
Woody Allen
The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
Woody Allen
There are three things Jewish people worship-God, Chinese food and wall-to-wall carpeting.
Woody Allen
Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.
Woody Allen
I don't like to reminisce much, and my walls don't have photographs of me and the actors I was with, or any of that stuff... I try and keep that disciplined, and just work. There are so many traps you can get into, and looking back on your own work is certainly one of them.
Woody Allen
I'm awash in self-contempt!
Woody Allen
The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you.
Woody Allen
Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
Woody Allen
The wicked at heart probably know something.
Woody Allen
The audience goes to sleep really quickly! If you have a slight pause at the wrong time, that's it!
Woody Allen
What was the scandal? I fell in love with this girl, married her. We have been married for almost 15 years now.
Woody Allen
Child molestation is a touchy subject... Read the papers! Half the country's doing it!
Woody Allen
I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.
Woody Allen
I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
Woody Allen
