Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
Woody Allen
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Trying
Witty
Humorous
Atheist
Findings
Finding
God
Plumber
Funny
Agnostic
Inspirational
Sunday
More quotes by Woody Allen
If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
Woody Allen
Heaven knows, we all make mistakes. That's life - and chess.
Woody Allen
Change is almost always negative. Things degenerate.
Woody Allen
I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.
Woody Allen
I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
Woody Allen
I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.
Woody Allen
Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
Woody Allen
Those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach gym.
Woody Allen
My father worked for the same firm for 12 years. They fired him and replaced him with a tiny gadget that does everything my father does, only much better. The depressing thing is my mother ran out and bought one
Woody Allen
I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody's.
Woody Allen
The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down.
Woody Allen
I don't why whatever works and whatever doesn't. You just make the film that you enjoy making at the time, and you think there's a good chance that people might enjoy the story. You're surprised pleasantly when they do. It's just luck.
Woody Allen
I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.
Woody Allen
It's all through the actors I cannot write in that idiom
Woody Allen
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
Woody Allen
I don't wanna live on in my work. I wanna live on in my apartment.
Woody Allen
I believe in sex and death- two experiences that come once in a lifetime.
Woody Allen
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her.
Woody Allen
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead - not sick, not wounded - dead.
Woody Allen