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When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Feels
Guilt
Played
Baseball
Second
Softball
Humor
Steal
Funny
Base
Back
Stealing
Feel
Guilty
More quotes by Woody Allen
As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
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The heart wants what it wants. There's no logic to these things. You meet someone and you fall in love and that's that.
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Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK? It'll be a year come April 20th. I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday
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I always thought it would be very funny if I was a blind film director.
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There's something about my films they're informed by my sensibility. I have the same preoccupations, the same interests... there's just something in the nuance, and so you always know it's a film of mine whether I sign my name to it or not.
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My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make films.
Woody Allen
I write the script nobody sees it, not the people that put the money in the picture. I cast who I want, and make the film. That's why I've always felt the only thing standing between me and greatness, is me. There's no excuse for me not to be great except that I'm not.
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The audience goes to sleep really quickly! If you have a slight pause at the wrong time, that's it!
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You are much more dependent on luck than you think. People say if you want to have a good relationship, you have to work at it. But you never hear it about anything you really like, about sailing or going to soccer games.
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Have you ever taken a serious political stand on anything? Yeah. Sure. For twenty-four hours once I refused to eat grapes.
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The process of making films is so technically demanding that it's a distraction. You don't spend your time thinking about the philosophical content, which is often very depressing.
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There's no way to prove that there is no God. You just have to take it on faith.
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I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
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Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
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I love baseball. You know, it doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just very beautiful to watch.
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That (sex) was the most fun I ever had without laughing.
Woody Allen
Between the Pope and air conditioning, I'd choose air conditioning.
Woody Allen
One filmmaker makes films that are deep, intellectual, profound and confrontational. And the other one makes purely vacuous, escapist films. I'm not sure the one who makes escapist films is making a poorer contribution than the one who makes the deeper films.
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I think, on both sides of the camera or the novel: Distraction. I'm obsessed with: Can I get this actress or my third act to work? I'm distracted. I'm interested in that so I don't sit home and think, Gee, life is meaningless. We're all going to die. The universe is pulling apart at breakneck speed.
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I keep wondering if there is an afterlife, and if there is will they be able to break a twenty?
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