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You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Give
Humorous
Hedonist
Live
Wine
Hedonism
Book
Hundred
Hedonistic
Giving
Drink
Filmmaker
Make
Health
Birthday
Things
Pleasure
Witty
Age
Aging
Funny
Beer

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I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, [and] receives new truth as an angel from Heaven.
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Boy, the food at this place is really terrible. The other one says, Yeah, I know and such small portions. Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly.
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If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.
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I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
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Better not think too much. Relying more on the body: it is more trustworthy.
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What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
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I'm short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.
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When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce.
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There's no point in looking back, because there's nothing you can really do to improve the film. You can only aggravate and wish you had done stuff better.
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In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and someone to actually show up and do the revolting. Dress is usually casual and both parties may be flexible about time and place, but if either faction fails to attend, the whole enterprise is likely to come off badly.
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Life is unresolved, confusing, bewildering, puzzling, ambiguous. You don't really know what's going to happen. The future is uncertain for everybody.
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Don't you see the rest of the country looks upon New York like we're left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers? I think of us that way sometimes and I live here.
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The heart is a very, very resilient little muscle. It really is.
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I prefer the magic to reality, and have since I was 5 years old. Hopefully, I can continue to make films and constantly escape into them.
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Honey, there's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.
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If I could only see one miracle, just one miracle. Like a burning bush, or the seas part, or my uncle Sasha pick up a check.
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As a boy, I was ashamed to wear glasses. I memorized the eye chart, and then on the test they asked essay questions.
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If I could change the structure of existence I would do it. I could see a better way to live for everybody.
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