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If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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Banking
Would
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Skepticism
Like
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Funny
Humorous
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Making
Atheist
Atheistic
Money
Sign
Swiss
Give
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Bankers
More quotes by Woody Allen
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.
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I believe people ought to mate for life...like pigeons or Catholics.
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I don't like to reminisce much, and my walls don't have photographs of me and the actors I was with, or any of that stuff... I try and keep that disciplined, and just work. There are so many traps you can get into, and looking back on your own work is certainly one of them.
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Eternity is really long, especially near the end.
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When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce.
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
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I don't like to meet the actor and have a lot of conferences and talk about their sub-life and their off-screen life and their back stories and all that nonsense, because it never means anything.
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I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.
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If I could just hope to have a major talent, then I would rather have it in music than in any other field.
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I, interestingly, had dated a woman in the Eisenhower Administration briefly, and it was ironic to me 'cause I was trying to do toher what Eisenhower has been doing to the country for the last eight years.
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In the shower, with the hot water coming down, you've left the real world behind, and very frequently things open up for you. It's the change of venue, the unblocking the attempt to force the ideas that's crippling you when you're trying to write.
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If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food. Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.
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I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving dishes for Chinese restaurants.
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I think universal harmony is a pipedream and it may be more productive to focus on more modest goals, like a ban on yodeling.
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I had an IQ test. The results came back negative.
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Paranoia is knowing all the facts.
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The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence.
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Psychoanalyses is like music lessons, for 5 years you do not notice any progress and suddenly you can play the piano.
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Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful provided you get between the right man and the right woman.
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I do occasionally envy the person who is religious naturally, without being brainwashed into it or suckered into it by all the organized hustles.
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