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In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Woody Allen

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Woody Allen
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
House
Maker
Makers
Boss
Marriage
Wife
Decision

More quotes by Woody Allen

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My mind can never know my body, although it has become quite friendly with my legs.
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It is clear the future holds great opportunities. It also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to avoid the pitfalls, seize the opportunities, and get back home by six o'clock.
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As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
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Usually, you hire people that you think are wonderful.
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People always ask me, Do you ever think you'll wake up one morning and not be funny? That thought would never occur to me--it's an odd thought and not realistic. Because funny and me are not separate. We're one.
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I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.
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There's no way to prove that there is no God. You just have to take it on faith.
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We live in far too permissive a society. Never before has pornography been this rampant. And those films are so badly lit!
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If my soul exists without my body I am convinced all my clothes will be loose-fitting
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I took a puff of the wrong cigarette at a fraternity dance once, and the cops had to get me, y'know. I broke two teeth trying to give a hickie to the Statue of Liberty.
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Sex is better than talk. Ask anybody in this bar. Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have.
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It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blowing off.
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No matter what the shrinks, or the pundits, or the self-help books tell you, when it comes to love, it's luck.
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Human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun.
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I'm generally not a social dramatist or comedy writer. My interests have always been more in psychological stories or personal relations and comic ideas.
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For God sakes, this is a woman I was married to for 10 years. We made love. I'd hold her head over the toilet bowl when she threw up.
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Sylvia Plath. Interesting poetess whose tragic suicide was misinterpreted as romantic by the college-girl mentality.
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Achilles only had an Achilles heel, I have an entire Achilles body.
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