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I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
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Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
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With me it's just a genetic dissatisfaction with everything.
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I recently turned 60. Practically a third of my life is over.
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Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
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If I just got up in the morning and had no place to go and was retired or something, I would be sitting there and be thinking, Gee, what is the purpose of life? Why are we all finite? Why do we get old and die? Is there nothing out there? Why is it so tragic? Why do our loved ones perish? Why do we generate? Who wants to think about that stuff
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I think it's my job or the artist's job, to try and find some solution or some reason to accept things. But given the grimmest reality, I feel the grimmest facts are the real facts, the true facts: that you're born, you die, you suffer, it's to no purpose, and you're gone forever, ever, ever, and that's it.
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I keep wondering if there is an afterlife, and if there is will they be able to break a twenty?
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Let's say there was no terrorism whatsoever and we were all very nice to one another and we were all kind, we still would be faced with an extremely cruel and hostile universe and existence and so I'm a great pessimist and I feel that it's impossible really to be happy, and that the best you can hope for is to be distracted.
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The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have.
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Fantasy is seductive and much more wonderful than reality, but you can't take it to the bank. It's always an escape. And if used as an escape, as in attending a movie or a show for a circumscribed period of time, it's fine. When it starts to become undifferentiated from reality, it leads to big trouble.
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I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, [and] receives new truth as an angel from Heaven.
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I always feel the cynicism is reality with maybe an alternate spelling or something because I feel that I have real perspective on this particular issue of punishment in society.
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You'll find as you go through life that great depth and smoldering sensuality don't always win.
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Some women feel power is important, some women feel that looks are important, tenderness, intelligence...but sense of humor seems to permeate all of them.
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Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
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You know, it's one thing about intellectuals, they prove that you can be absolutely brilliant and have no idea what's going on.
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The best an idea gets is when its in your head.
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I know of only six genuine comic geniuses in movie history Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Groucho Marx & Harpo Marx, Peter Sellers, and W.C. Fields.
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And my parents finally realize I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They rent out my room.
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Well, trouble's my middle name. Actually, my middle name is Marion, but I don't want you spreading that around.
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