Quote

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

Woody Allen

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Woody Allen
Age: 88
Born: 1935
Born: December 1
Author
Character Actor
Clarinetist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Jazz Musician
Journalist
Musician
Playwright
The Bronx
New York City
Allan Stewart Konigsberg
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
Heywood Allen
Make
Thinking
Life
Hipster
Laughter
Laugh
Plans
Laughing
Tell

More quotes by Woody Allen

Image
One of the interesting things is, the most gifted people, the biggest people, have no problem taking small roles.
Woody Allen
Image
If you meet somebody and are attracted to someone, and the exquisite neurons in your brain and her brain intermesh properly, then things can be wonderful. It's not like homework. You don't have to work at the relationship.
Woody Allen
Image
I have great faith in the actors. When they improvise, it always sounds better than the stuff I write in my bedroom. When they improvise, they make it sound alive.
Woody Allen
Image
One man starving puts a crimp in my evening.
Woody Allen
Image
You make a film and always hope you're going make Citizen Kane or The Bicycle Thief. You make the film, and for one reason or another, one clicks and one doesn't, but it's out of your control completely.
Woody Allen
Image
Marriage is the death of hope.
Woody Allen
Image
Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end.
Woody Allen
Image
In short, the best thing to do is behave in a manner befitting one's age. If you are sixteen or under, try not to go bald.
Woody Allen
Image
Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
Woody Allen
Image
I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
Woody Allen
Image
I was in analysis. I was suicidal. As a matter of fact, I would have killed myself, but I was in analysis with a strict Freudian and if you kill yourself they make you pay for the sessions you miss.
Woody Allen
Image
I can live in Paris for four months or London or, you know, Barcelona. These are places that are like New York. But I don't think I could live in many places. When I had to make a film in the United States I picked San Francisco because to me it's one of the great cities of America.
Woody Allen
Image
I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
Woody Allen
Image
No one ever wants the whole script. I give the whole script to people who require the whole script but to those people who don't require the whole script I don't give it to them and no one cares. They're relieved not to have to read extra pages that they're not in.
Woody Allen
Image
God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
Woody Allen
Image
I never ever see a film of mine after I release it to the public. I see it when I shoot it in my dailies and while I'm editing it, re-editing it and reshooting it and all that. By the time it's finished I never want to see it again.
Woody Allen
Image
See, I will always have this penchant for what I call kamikaze women. I call them kamikazes because they, you know they crash their plane, they're self-destructive. But they crash into you, and you die along with them.
Woody Allen
Image
Death is an acquired trait.
Woody Allen
Image
This sounds so bleak when I say it, but we need some delusions to keep us going. And the people who successfully delude themselves seem happier than the people who can't.
Woody Allen
Image
I sold my memoirs of my love life to Parker Brothers and they are going to make a game out of it.
Woody Allen