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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Gambling
Sure
Nothing
Something
Way

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The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
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I want a priest, a rabbi and a Protestant minister. I want to hedge my bets.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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The first hundred years are the hardest.
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You're a mouse studying to be a rat.
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I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.
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Florida was invented for Addison Mizner's little brother.
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A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.
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I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.
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I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.
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The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.
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Don't talk about yourself it will be done when you leave.
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The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.
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Anybody who can write home for money can write for magazines.
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Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.
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Most hard-boiled people are half-baked.
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Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.
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The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.
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