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The most pitiful human ailment is a birdseed heart.
Wilson Mizner
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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Pitiful
Greed
Human
Humans
Heart
Ailment
Ailments
More quotes by Wilson Mizner
The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
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The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.
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The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.
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Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you
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If you steal from one author it's plagiarism if you steal from many it's research.
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What feeling is so nice as a child's hand in yours? So small, so soft and warm, like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp.
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All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.
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I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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He's a trellis for varicose veins.
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The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.
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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.
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I want a priest, a rabbi and a Protestant minister. I want to hedge my bets.
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I never saw a mob rush across town to do a good deed.
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Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch Tact is the clever footwork.
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The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.
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Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.
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