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You're a mouse studying to be a rat.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Rats
Mice
Studying
Sarcastic
Study
Mouse

More quotes by Wilson Mizner

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He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.
Wilson Mizner
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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.
Wilson Mizner
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Easy street is a blind alley.
Wilson Mizner
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The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.
Wilson Mizner
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The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.
Wilson Mizner
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The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
Wilson Mizner
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The first hundred years are the hardest.
Wilson Mizner
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To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.
Wilson Mizner
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.
Wilson Mizner
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
Wilson Mizner
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The only bird that gives the poor a real tumble is the stork.
Wilson Mizner
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Women can instantly see through each other, and it's surprising how little they observe that's pleasant.
Wilson Mizner
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I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.
Wilson Mizner
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All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.
Wilson Mizner
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It's getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner.
Wilson Mizner
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I had never considered marriage, but I had an open mind, and I was to learn after a brief try at it that most open minds should be closed for repairs.
Wilson Mizner
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I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.
Wilson Mizner
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Anybody who can write home for money can write for magazines.
Wilson Mizner
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
Wilson Mizner
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He's a trellis for varicose veins.
Wilson Mizner