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He's a trellis for varicose veins.
Wilson Mizner
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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Veins
Sarcastic
More quotes by Wilson Mizner
Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you
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Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.
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The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.
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To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.
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I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.
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I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.
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You're a mouse studying to be a rat.
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Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.
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Women can instantly see through each other, and it's surprising how little they observe that's pleasant.
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.
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Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.
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Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
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Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.
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The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.
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A fellow who is always declaring that he's no fool, usually has his suspicions.
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A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.
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The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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Don't talk about yourself it will be done when you leave.
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I had never considered marriage, but I had an open mind, and I was to learn after a brief try at it that most open minds should be closed for repairs.
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