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He's a trellis for varicose veins.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Veins
Sarcastic

More quotes by Wilson Mizner

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What feeling is so nice as a child's hand in yours? So small, so soft and warm, like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp.
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The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.
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I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.
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A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.
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I never saw a mob rush across town to do a good deed.
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Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.
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The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch Tact is the clever footwork.
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If you steal from one author it's plagiarism if you steal from many it's research.
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I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.
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Easy street is a blind alley.
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Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.
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I had never considered marriage, but I had an open mind, and I was to learn after a brief try at it that most open minds should be closed for repairs.
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It is criminal negligence to leave suckers lying around to tempt honest men.
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All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.
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Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.
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A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.
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I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.
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Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you
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The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
Wilson Mizner