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The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Halfway
Clock
Bird
Cuckoo
Cuckoos

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I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.
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Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.
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If you steal from one author it's plagiarism if you steal from many it's research.
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The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.
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The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.
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The first hundred years are the hardest.
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The day which we fear as our last is but the bday of eternity. - By SenecaThe first hundred years are the hardest.
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I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.
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I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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Don't talk about yourself it will be done when you leave.
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A good party is where you enjoy good people, and they taste even better with Champagne.
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I had never considered marriage, but I had an open mind, and I was to learn after a brief try at it that most open minds should be closed for repairs.
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What feeling is so nice as a child's hand in yours? So small, so soft and warm, like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp.
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He's a trellis for varicose veins.
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I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.
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Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
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Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.
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