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The first hundred years are the hardest.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Firsts
First
Years
Birthday
Hardest
Hundred

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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.
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The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.
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If you steal from one author it's plagiarism if you steal from many it's research.
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The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.
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I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch Tact is the clever footwork.
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All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.
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A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.
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I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
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I had never considered marriage, but I had an open mind, and I was to learn after a brief try at it that most open minds should be closed for repairs.
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I want a priest, a rabbi and a Protestant minister. I want to hedge my bets.
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Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.
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It's getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner.
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A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.
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Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.
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I never saw a mob rush across town to do a good deed.
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