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The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

Wilson Mizner

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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Giving
Friendship
Way
Humor
Friends
Funny
Away
Keep
Give
Best

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Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.
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To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.
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I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch Tact is the clever footwork.
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The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
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What feeling is so nice as a child's hand in yours? So small, so soft and warm, like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.
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I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .'
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Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.
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Failure has gone to his head.
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I want a priest, a rabbi and a Protestant minister. I want to hedge my bets.
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Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.
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I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.
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I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.
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Most hard-boiled people are half-baked.
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Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you
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Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.
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I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.
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