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The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.
Wilson Mizner
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Wilson Mizner
Age: 56 †
Born: 1876
Born: May 19
Died: 1933
Died: April 3
Playwright
Screenwriter
Writer
Benicia
California
Keep
Give
Best
Giving
Friendship
Way
Humor
Friends
Funny
Away
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Gambling: A sure way to get nothing from something.
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Count 10 over him - he'll get up
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A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.
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Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch Tact is the clever footwork.
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The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong.
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If you count all your assets you always show a profit.
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There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.
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Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.
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There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.
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The only bird that gives the poor a real tumble is the stork.
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I want a priest, a rabbi and a Protestant minister. I want to hedge my bets.
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He's a trellis for varicose veins.
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The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.
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The day which we fear as our last is but the bday of eternity. - By SenecaThe first hundred years are the hardest.
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I never saw a mob rush across town to do a good deed.
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The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.
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Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.
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A good party is where you enjoy good people, and they taste even better with Champagne.
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