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Where I come from, they won't let me play with this rope. They think I might hurt myself.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Humor
Hurt
Funny
Might
Come
Play
Think
Thinking
Rope

More quotes by Will Rogers

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Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
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If your time is worth anything, travel by air. If not, you might just as well walk.
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I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened.
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Pain is such an uncomfortable feeling that even a tiny amount of it is enough to ruin every enjoyment.
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Hurray! Congress is to adjourn! Only four more days of Congressional burglary on the Treasury!
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I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat! If we ever pass out as a great nation we ought to put on our tombstone 'America died from a delusion that she had moral leadership.'
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George Bernard Shaw of England stopped over just long enough to make one speech in Bombay, India, started a war and 100 Indians killed each other. That's what I call good speech-making. The only enthusiasm any of our speakers can rouse is a demand to kill the speaker.
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If all politicians fished instead of spoke publicly, we would be at peace with the world.
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Say, this new home building idea of President Hoover's sounds good. They are working out a lot of beneficial things. The only thing is it took 'em so long to think of any of 'em. We ought to have plans in case of depression, just like we do in case of fire, 'Walk, don't run, to the nearest exit.'
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They are voting whether to keep a governor two years or four. I think a good, honest governor should get four years, and the others life.
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Under capitalism man exploits man under socialism the reverse is true.
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There is nothing in the world that we do as much as we do eating
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You shake a slogan at an American and it's just like showing a hungry dog a bone.
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Rotation of crops and less automobiles will relieve the farmers whenever they decide to try it.
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There's a simple solution to our traffic problems. We'll have business build the roads, and government build the cars.
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An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
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The president says, 'There is lots of people worse off than the Farmers.' I don't know who it could be unless it is the fellow who holds the Mortgages on the Farms.
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Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.
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You see, in Washington they have these bodies, Senate and the House of Representatives. That is for the convenience of the visitors. If there is nothing funny happening in one, there is sure to be in the other, and in case one body passes a good bill, why, the other can see it in time and kill it.
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Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
Will Rogers