Quote

You should never try and teach a pig to read for two reasons. First, it's impossible and secondly, it annoys the hell out of the pig!.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Read
Impossibility
Two
Pigs
Reason
Annoying
Firsts
Reasons
Book
Hell
First
Impossible
Trying
Teach
Annoys
Never
Reading
Secondly

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Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
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Common sense ain't common.
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Syntax must be bad, having sin and tax in it.
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Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else, but when it happens to you, why it seems to lose some of its Humor, and if it keeps on happening, why the entire laughter kinder Fades out of it.
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Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
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I argue with wife over what little pieces of real estate investments we should try to pay on and hold, and which to let go back. We always said, Put it in land, and you can always walk on it. We did, but no buyers would walk on it with us.
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The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
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There is no credit to being a comedian, when you have the whole Government working for you. All you have to do is report the facts. I dont even have to exaggerate.
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You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one
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Work to make a living serve to make a life.
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I doubt if a charging elephant, or a rhino, is as determined or hard to check as a socially ambitious mother.
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Steak on the plate went up. Steak on the hoof went down.
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The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he's got.
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A president just can't make much showing against congress. They lay awake nights, thinking up things to be against the president on.
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People want just taxes more than they want lower taxes. They want to know that every man is paying his proportionate share according to his wealth.
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The small town is passing. It was the incubator that hatched all our big men, and that's why we haven't got as many big men today as we used to have. Take every small-town-raised leader out of business and you would have nobody left running it but vice-presidents.
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With all our crime and all our immorality ... and about as much contentment and respose as a fresh-caged hyena, we go to tell the whole world: we are the only one with the right idea!
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I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk of old times with old friends is the greatest thing in the world.
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I would love to see Mr. (Henry) Ford in there, really. I don't know who started the idea that a President must be a Politician instead of a Business man. A Politician can't run any other kind of business. So there is no reason why he can run the U.S. That's the biggest single business in the World.
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If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
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