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If this depression stays with us, the loser Tuesday is going to be the winner.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Politics
Going
Tuesday
Stays
Loser
Winner
Depression

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I have always noticed that people will never laugh at anything that is not based on truth.
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I never took a human life, I only sold the fellow the gun to take it with.
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If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
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If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?
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So the question rises: How much liberty can you get away with? Well, you get no more liberty than you give!
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Both gangs have been bad sports, so see if at least one can't redeem themselves by offering no alibis, but cooperate with the winner, for no matter which one it is the poor fellow is going to need it.
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Legalize racing in every State. Sure people will bet, but they get to see the horses run and you certain can't see General Motors and General Electric and General Utility run when you bet on them.
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Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
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Politics is the best show in America. I love animals and I love politicians, and I like to watch both of 'em at play, either back home in their native state, or after they've been captured and sent to a zoo, or to Washington.
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In a real estate man's eye, the most expensive part of the city is where he has a house to sell
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It costs ten times more to govern us than it used to, and we are not governed one-tenth as good.
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Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach
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The stock market has spoiled more appetites than bad cooking.
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In the Middle West now you got to put a brand on your soil, then in the Spring go on a round-up looking for it.
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Everyone is a self-made man. Only the successful admit it.
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You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
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That's the trouble with our charities we are always saving somebody away off, when the fellow next to us ain't eating.
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If you want to know when a war might be coming, you just watch the U.S. and see when it starts cutting down on its defenses. It's the surest barometer in the world.
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My own mother died when I was 10 years old. My folks have told me that what little humor I have comes from her. I can't remember her humor, but I can remember her love and understanding of me.
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The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
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