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You have a wonderful organization. I understand you have ten thousand here. And if you count the ones in the various federal prisons, it brings your total membership up to around thirty thousand.
Will Rogers
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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Thousand
Thirty
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More quotes by Will Rogers
Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach
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The president says, 'There is lots of people worse off than the Farmers.' I don't know who it could be unless it is the fellow who holds the Mortgages on the Farms.
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All I know is just what I read in the Congressional Record. They have had some awful funny articles in there lately. As our government deteriorates, our humor increases.
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If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
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Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans
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And, when the votes are counted, let everybody, including the candidates, get into a good humor as quick as they got into a bad one.
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Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.
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But we can't alibi all our ills by just knocking the old banker. First he loaned the money, then the people all at once wanted it back, and he didn't have it. Now he's got it again, and is afraid to loan it, so the poor devil don't know what to do.
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Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
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Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
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The rest of the people know the condition of the country, for they live in it, but Congress has no idea what is going on in America, so the President has to tell 'em.
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The minute you read something and you can't understand it, you can be sure it was written by a lawyer. Then, if you give it to another lawyer to read and he don't know just what it means, then you can be sure it was drawn up by a lawyer. If it's in a few words and is plain, and understandable only one way, it was written by a non-lawyer.
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That's one thing about Republican Presidents. They never went in much for plans. They only had one plan. It says Boys, my head is turned. Just get it while you can.
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Parades should be classed as a Nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison. They stop more work, inconvenience more people, stop more traffic, cause more accidents, entail more expense, and commit and cause I don't remember the other hundred misdemeanors.
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The small town is passing. It was the incubator that hatched all our big men, and that's why we haven't got as many big men today as we used to have. Take every small-town-raised leader out of business and you would have nobody left running it but vice-presidents.
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The good old horse-and-buggy days: then you lived until you died and not until you were run over.
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I was born because it was a habit in those days, people didn't know anything else ... I was not a Child Prodigy, because a Child Prodigy is a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up.
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I belong to no organized political body. I am a Democrat.
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I am a great believer in high-priced people. If a thing cost a lot it may not be any better, but it adds a certain amount of class that the cheap thing can never approach in the long run it's the higher-priced things that are the cheapest.
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That's the trouble with a politician's life-somebody is always interrupting it with an election.
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