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If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Person
Kick
Kicks
Problems
Inspiration
Week
Causes
Problem
Tail
Persons
Tails

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Every guy looks in his pocket and then votes.
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Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.
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Every Gag I tell must be based on truth. No matter how much I may exaggerate it, it must have a certain amount of Truth.... Now Rumor travels Faster, but it don't stay put as long as Truth.
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You can have all the advanced war methods you want, but, after all, nobody has ever invented a war that you don't have to have somebody in the guise of soldiers to stop the bullets.
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If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
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Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
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In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.
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You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people.
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Your mothers get mighty shocked at you girls nowadays, but in her day, her mother was just on the verge of sending her to reform school.
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The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
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There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
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We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.
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In Washington, one man could do what ten of them do. Things kinder run themselves, anyhow.
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But we can't alibi all our ills by just knocking the old banker. First he loaned the money, then the people all at once wanted it back, and he didn't have it. Now he's got it again, and is afraid to loan it, so the poor devil don't know what to do.
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The money was all appropriated for the top in the hopes that it would trickle down to the needy. Mr. Hoover didn’t know that money trickled up. Give it to the people at the bottom and the people at the top will have it before night, anyhow. But it will at least have passed through the poor fellow’s hands.
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Common sense ain't common.
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Labor Day, I suppose set by an Act of Congress. Everything we do nowadays is either by, or against, Acts of Congress. How Congress knew anything about Labor is beyond us.
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I go too fast to see much, only the tops of everything. I've got to prowl slow some time through this country.
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The only thing that can stop hair from falling ... is the floor.
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We elect our Presidents, be they Republican or Democrat, then start daring 'em to make good.
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