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If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week
Will Rogers
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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
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Tail
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Tails
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Kick
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Week
More quotes by Will Rogers
Don't be misled by History, or any other unreliable source.
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Never miss a chance to shut up
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You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
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Local conservation programs can help our communities shape thoughtful growth.
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Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach
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Labor Day, I suppose set by an Act of Congress. Everything we do nowadays is either by, or against, Acts of Congress. How Congress knew anything about Labor is beyond us.
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See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails
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There is something about a Republican that you can only stand him just so long and on the other hand, there is something about a Democrat that you can't stand him quite that long.
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There are three types of men in the world. One type learns from books. One type learns from observations. And one type just has to urinate on the electric fence himself.
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My father was one-eighth Cherokee indian and my mother was quarter-blood Cherokee. I never got far enough in arithmetic to figure out how much injun that made me, but there's nothing of which I am more proud than my Cherokee blood.
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When you straddle a thing it takes a long time to explain it.
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With old inflation riding the headlines, I have read till I am bleary-eyed, and I can't get head from tails of the whole thing. ... Now we are living in an age of explanations-and plenty of 'em, too-but no two things that's been done to us have been explained twice the same way, by even the same man. It's and age of in one ear and out the other.
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The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.
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Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.
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Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
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A debt is just as hard for a Government to pay as it is for an individual. No debt ever comes due at a good time. Borrowing is the only thing that seems handy all the time.
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But we can't alibi all our ills by just knocking the old banker. First he loaned the money, then the people all at once wanted it back, and he didn't have it. Now he's got it again, and is afraid to loan it, so the poor devil don't know what to do.
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Prosperity this Winter is going to be enjoyed by everybody that is fortunate enough to get into the poor farm.
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It's great to be great, but its greater to be human.
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The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
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