Quote

All one has to do to get one's stuff in the Congressional Record is to find a stenographer that can stay awake long enough to take it down. Then you mark in the 'Applause' and 'Laughter' parts yourself.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Stuff
Awake
America
Parts
Find
Laughter
Take
Congress
Enough
Mark
Long
Record
Stay
Congressional
Records
Applause

More quotes by Will Rogers

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It's the greatest game I ever saw. You can't lose. Everybody buys to sell and nobody buys to keep. What's worrying me is who is going to be the last owner. It's just like an auction the only one stuck is the last one.
Will Rogers
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When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.
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The bankers just got a good cussing by everybody for loaning too much money. Well, they got some awful nice buildings. So when a banker fails, he fails in splendor.
Will Rogers
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That's one thing about Republican Presidents. They never went in much for plans. They only had one plan. It says Boys, my head is turned. Just get it while you can.
Will Rogers
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The trouble with our praying is, we just do it as a means of last resort.
Will Rogers
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Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.
Will Rogers
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Shrewdness in public life all over the world is always honored, while honesty in public men is generally attributed to dumbness and is seldom rewarded.
Will Rogers
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Nobody wants his cause near as bad as he wants to talk about his cause.
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Everything worthwhile is a good idea, but did you ever notice there is more bad ideas that will work than there is good ones?
Will Rogers
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I wonder if it isn't just cowardice instead of generosity that makes us give tips.
Will Rogers
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America is a land of opportunity and don't ever forget it.
Will Rogers
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Bankers are likeable rascals. Now that we are all wise to 'em, it's been shown that they don't know any more about finances than the rest of us know about our businesses... which has proved to be nothing.
Will Rogers
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There wasn't any more truth in over half of what any so-called orator said. If it wasn't a Deliberate Lie, why it was an Exaggerated Falsehood.
Will Rogers
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Samuel Gompers has spent his life trying to keep labor from working too hard and has succeeded beyond his wildest dreams.
Will Rogers
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Banking and after-dinner speaking are two of the most nonessential industries we have in this country. I am ready to reform, if they are.
Will Rogers
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Outside of traffic, there is nothing that has held this country back as much as committees.
Will Rogers
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When a fellow ain't got much mind, it don't take him long to make it up.
Will Rogers
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See where Congress passed a two billion dollar bill to relieve bankers' mistakes. You can always count on us helping those who have lost part of their fortune, but our whole history records nary a case where the loan was for the man who had absolutely nothing. Our theory is to help only those who can get along, even if they don't get a loan.
Will Rogers
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We are here just for a spell and then pass on. So get a few laughs and do the best you can. Live your life so that whenever you lose it, you are ahead.
Will Rogers
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Old Hollywood is just like a desert water in Africa. Hang around long enough and every kind of animal in the world will drift in for refreshments.
Will Rogers