Quote

All one has to do to get one's stuff in the Congressional Record is to find a stenographer that can stay awake long enough to take it down. Then you mark in the 'Applause' and 'Laughter' parts yourself.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
America
Parts
Find
Laughter
Take
Congress
Enough
Mark
Long
Record
Stay
Congressional
Records
Applause
Stuff
Awake

More quotes by Will Rogers

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We have been just going like a house afire, and we couldent see any reason why we shouldent keep right on burning. Our tastes were acquired on credit, and we wanted to keep on enjoying 'em on credit.
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I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is - they like to run their own business. I know men that would -make my wife a better husband than I am but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.
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If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
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You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
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Every guy looks in his pocket and then votes.
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We are here just for a spell and then pass on. So get a few laughs and do the best you can. Live your life so that whenever you lose it, you are ahead.
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There's no way in the world you're going to make a political party respectable unless you keep it out of office.
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We are all ignorant. We are just ignorant about different things.
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Ability is all right but if it is not backed up by honesty and public confidence you will never be a successful person. The best a man can do is to arrive at the top in his chosen profession. I have always maintained that one profession is deserving of as much honor as another provided it is honorable.
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Now I am not unpatriotic, and I want to do my bit, so I hereby offer my services to my President, my country and my friends to do anything, outside of serving on a commission, that I can in this great movement. But you will have to give me some idea of where confidence is. And just who you want it restored to.
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There is nothing as easy as denouncing. It don't take much to see that something is wrong, but it does take some eyesight to see what will put it right again
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The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
Will Rogers
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You can't legitimately kick on income tax, for it's on what you have made. You have already made it. But, look at land, farms, homes, stores, vacant lots. You pay year after year on them whether you make it or not.
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When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
Will Rogers
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People love high ideals, but they got to be about 33-percent plausible
Will Rogers
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Every time somebody has thought of relief for the farmer it has been to make it so he could borrow more money. What he needs is some way to pay back. Not some way to borrow more.
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Texas is a great state. It's the 'Old Man River' of states. No matter who runs it or what happens to it politically, it just keeps rolling along!
Will Rogers
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Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Will Rogers
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There ain't nothing that breaks up homes, country and nations like somebody publishing their memoirs
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Americans are getting like a Ford car, they all have the same exact parts, the same upholstering and make exactly the same noises.
Will Rogers