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I have always noticed that people will never laugh at anything that is not based on truth.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Based
Laughing
Humor
Truth
Anything
Always
Never
Noticed
People
Laugh

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I love words but I don't like strange ones. You don't understand them and they don't understand you. Old words is like old friends, you know 'em the minute you see 'em.
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We have the best Congress that money can buy.
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If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production.
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There wasn't any Republicans in Washington's day. No Republicans, no Boll Weevil, no income tax, no cover charge, no disarmament conference, no luncheon clubs, no stop lights, no static, no head winds. My Lord, living in those days, who wouldn't be great?
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It's the greatest game I ever saw. You can't lose. Everybody buys to sell and nobody buys to keep. What's worrying me is who is going to be the last owner. It's just like an auction the only one stuck is the last one.
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There are two things I don't care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist's testimony, and the other is a railroad timetable.
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Andrew Jackson was the first one to think up the idea to promise everybody that if they will vote for you, you will give them an office when you get it, and the more times they vote for you, the bigger the office.
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There is one guaranteed formula for failure, and that is to try to please everyone.
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I'm not a member of an organized party. I'm a Democrat.
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Americans are getting like a Ford car, they all have the same exact parts, the same upholstering and make exactly the same noises.
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If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?
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If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week
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A politician is just like a pickpocket it's almost impossible to get him to reform.
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Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help them back to bed again.
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I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
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I love horses and I only ask-don't let me know which one we are eating today.
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A king can stand people's fighting but he can't last long if people start thinking.
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The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid.
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I'll bet you the time ain't far off when a woman won't know any more than a man.
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If your time is worth anything, travel by air. If not, you might just as well walk.
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