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Wish all the Farmers would move to town one year, that's the only way I know to clear the thing up.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Way
Towns
Would
Move
Year
Clear
Wish
Moving
Agriculture
Thing
Farmers
Years
Town

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Parades should be classed as a nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison.
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The small town is passing. It was the incubator that hatched all our big men, and that's why we haven't got as many big men today as we used to have. Take every small-town-raised leader out of business and you would have nobody left running it but vice-presidents.
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Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won't work.
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Politicians are just a bunch of local bandits, sent by their local voters to raid the public treasury.
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Never blame a legislative body for not doing something. When they do nothing, that don't hurt anybody. When they do something is when they become dangerous.
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The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
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And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
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You can have all the advanced war methods you want, but, after all, nobody has ever invented a war that you don't have to have somebody in the guise of soldiers to stop the bullets.
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When I die, my epitaph or whatever you call those signs on gravestones is going to read: I joked about every prominent man of my time, but I never met a man I didn't like. I am so proud of that I can hardly wait to die so it can be carved. And when you come to my grave you will find me sitting there, proudly reading it.
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We're all ignorant, just about different stuff.
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The sales tax is the best and most equitable tax. The gasoline tax, which is nothing but a sales tax, has proven painless, productive and punitive. Everything we buy should have its equal proportion of tax, outside of cheap food and cheap clothes.
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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
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So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn the other fellow for doing what we are doing every day, only in a different way.
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The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
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It's the fellow who knows when to quit that the audience wants more of.
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I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
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You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.
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The budget is like a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, then reaches in and tries to pull real ones out.
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Alexander Hamilton originated the put and take system in our national treasury: the taxpayers put it in, and the politicians take it out
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Always drink upstream from the herd.
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